Fighting the Fight

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith." 2 Timothy 4:7

...."Luke has childhood onset glaucoma, " Dr. Edmunds said. Even though I knew those words to be true, they stung in my ears. Why? is the question that keeps going through my mind. Why Luke? He has been through so much. Let him be.

Today has been a horrible day. Just personal reasons that I am not sharing at this time. Perhaps later.

I am in the middle of a fight. A LONG fight. A fight for justice, a fight of fairness, a fight for Luke. He deserves so much, but all I am fighting for is what should be his anyway. I am fighting agencies, I am fighting government, I am fighting schools, I am fighting with doctor's records departments. I am even fighting the people that speak acceptance of blessings like Luke. I am fighting for him to get a good education, fighting for his health and wholeness, and fighting for funding to cover everything I can't. I am fighting for a job to provide the things that I fight for him. It is never ending. And I am fighting tiredness, discouragement and loneliness. I will give you one guess on how many friends I have with children who have any two of Luke's many syndromes. I am fighting scary thoughts I have when the house is quiet and I am alone. I am fighting against wondering what life would be like if Luke was blind. It brings me to tears even now. He got a a little be be gun for his birthday. Both grandmas were not happy about this in the least. It was funny...or ironic...or sad...I wasn't worried about the safety aspect. I was glad he was having the opportunity because it is something he wouldn't be able to do if he was blind.

I try not to think too much about those thoughts, but they are there. Swirling around in the back of my head waiting for quiet moments to flood my mind. So today the fight is done. I will of course pick up fighting for him tomorrow.