Unknowns

If there is one thing that irritates me in this world...it is not knowing. I HATE the unknowns. Unfortunately everything is an unknown right now. We finally have the two appointments scheduled for Luke's eye genetics. I did find out that they are going to have to sedate him to take pictures of his eyes. I don't like that idea, but I understand. Then a few weeks later we have an appointment to meet with that doctor.

Then there is the whole issues of school choice. I wish someone would just make the decision for me. I think this is always the most difficult decision for me. There are so many ways to look at this and so many layers to this puzzle. Here is a little background. Currently Luke is in public school. He is being served on his IEP. No matter what choice we would make for Luke(public, private, home school) he is entitled to receive his specialized instruction on his IEP. It is his right. Public school is experiencing major budget cuts. Larger class sizes, fewer teachers, less programing, resources and tools will be the reality. This is concerning to me as a parent of any child, but with Luke especially. He requires a lot of attention and in a class of 30 that is not a lot of teacher time to go around. Luke is picked on and made fun of by classmates because he is "different". Kids today know MUCH more than we did. He fights us tooth and nail to go to school everyday because he says he HATES school.

We have tried private school. It was awesome in kindergarten and just what Luke needed. The small class sizes are great, but the work load is very difficult for him. He is not the typical "cookie cutter" kid. I have heard that he requires too much attention of the teacher and takes away from other students in the private setting (which breaks my heart and infuriates me all at the same time). I feel like screaming at the top of lungs "don't you all get it? Don't you see? He NEEDS people to SUPPORT him now more than ever." BUT...I know the rules of private schools...they do not have to, nor do many of them except any students with special needs into their programs because they do not have the ability to serve them. I would like to CHANGE that. I see the vast need for CHRISTIAN EDUCATION and children with special needs. I have researched until I have been exhausted and there just are NO options for kids like Luke. How sad is that? Parents who desire to bring up their children and educate them in the ways of the Lord through Christian Education are left with very few options for doing so. And then there is the cost....who has 4800 dollars per kid laying around these days? Take that times 2 kids and then add 350 dollars a month in gas to transport them each way and the total monthly payment for private Christian Education is around 1300 dollars per month. And this is where I can start with the I HATE money conversation. STINKS.

Homeschooling is what my children keep asking me to do. I give it a lot of deep thought. Mark and I pray about this. It is a VALID option. I am a licensed Washington State Teacher with a K-8 and preschool through 12th grade special education endorsement. I am QUALIFIED. This option would need to be thoroughly planned out and orchestrated. I would NOT use the Home Choice Academy program as it is not appropriate for Luke. I would need a break from the kids each week and they would need to be around and socialize with other kids too. I would need to find some type of home school co-0p that would support homeschooling of kids like Luke. The adult support would be great too. I don't know if this is the answer, but it is an option.

I did try and get a 2nd grade teaching job at the Christian school so I could get the educator teacher discount so we could afford to send the kids to school, but it didn't work out. I am TRUSTING God that He sees the WHOLE picture and HE knows what is best for our family.

I would LOVE to hear thoughts or insight into these unknown school choices. You could post in the comment section or email me at misscarissa@hotmail.com